Honor, Worship, and Your Marriage

In the passage we discussed tonight, Jesus responded to a challenge from the Pharisees by pointing out that, as Isaiah said,

These people honor me with their lips,
but their hearts are far from me.
They worship me in vain...

After discussing what it means to worship in vain (going through motions to make oneself look or feel good; external behavior that doesn't come from the heart, and so on), we changed the context.

Instead of God's relationship to people, we talked about the marriage relationship. Is it possible to honor your spouse with your lips while your heart is far from him/her, and to love him/her in vain? After talking about what that might look like, and what it might feel like, the group came up with some good suggestions for avoiding or breaking out of that selfish mode.

• Be mindful of selfish behavior, and practice replacing "love in vain" with genuine love.
• Reviewing things you like/appreciate/love about your spouse when tempted to "love in vain".
  
• Confessing (to your spouse and to God) when you catch yourself loving in vain.

I think I may have forgotten a suggestion. If anyone remembers what it was, please post it in the comments.